In my life pre-God, whenever I had time I would fill it with reading (yea, I was the nerdy kid) which then progressed into singing, sitting at home practicing my soprano part. But now, well, I try to give God my every spare moment, but for some reason I just keep slipping up. I'll find myself with a different book (often facebook) in my hand or on the screen, the wrong tune in my head, and I'll realise that I'm not doing what I should be. Every spare moment should be spent with my God, because nothing is greater then knowing my Creator. There aren't enough words in my vocabulary to express my thanks to God. There aren't enough feelings in me to feel the sorrow I should for my screw-ups.
So, why? Why am I not overflowing with praise? Why are my conversations peppered with pride & seasoned with humour, instead of peppered with grace & seasoned with Jesus. I want to give Jesus every conversation that I have, but I don't. I want to give him every spare moment to just stop, and just talk or listen to him. But I don't. I just don't.
I want to give You my everything, but somethings holding me back.
God, change me. Please.
interesting:)
ReplyDeletedo you think that we should be dedicating all our spare time to consciously be spent with Him? i'd like to know what you think.
I belief that you don't devote every spare second of your life to god because this is both impossible and dangerous.
ReplyDeleteIf you were truly of the mindset you portray in your post, you would sit someplace safe and isolated and stop thinking about anything but your god. You may admit yourself nourishment, but only to keep alive and devoting to god. Your life would consist of nothing but praise to your creator.
You are human. You are flawed in the eyes of our societies morals. You are perfect in the eyes of the natural world and its processes.
You prove this in your own post, you are distracted and you lack the capacity you believe is necessary to give to your god.
Don't be held back or discouraged by human nature. It will only empty you from the inside, as wanting to change what you physically are is impossible.
From what I've seen from your blog as a whole, you are an incredible person, with great insights. You need not strive for unreachable goals. That's counter-intuitive and you're above it.
ß∑